5 Reasons Why Millennial Moms Deserve a Pat on Their Back

If you are reading this blog you are probably an expectant mother, a single one or maybe just someone whose friend is a yummy mummy. The zeitgeist of the millennial spirit may seem compellingly stereotypical however it rings very true of the generation’s mothers.

Fiercely loyal to affording nothing but the best to their loved ones, financially sound or work in progress towards building a safety net for themselves and their loved ones, multi-tasking geniuses, and the ability to wipe their tears off  themselves in case of lack of a reliable support system.

Inadvertent setbacks both major and minor may rattle her up for a bit, however, vodka shot and a bawling episode with her best friend later she is sorted enough to hit some sixes and boundaries. Grab a coffee and lend an ear to a mom who has been through some serious shit in life and yet sits their gracefully running a hand through her babies’ wisps of blond hair affectionately.

Many heartwarming repertoires and incidences of the epiphanies of motherhood will surely emerge. So what is it exactly that sets apart the moms born between 1978 and 1994 from those of the earlier generations? Is it their ability to garner a resounding applause juggling work, family and the pressures of raising a child? Or is it the equal involvement of a hands-on daddy? Ladies and gentlemen, it is a different ball game altogether with the cost of raising a child has gone up an astounding 18% in the current era from a mere 2% in 1960! If you are a millennial mom or know someone who is rocking the show with aplomb go pat yourself or her on the back because she is a/an,

  1. A Multi-tasker who knows her priorities

This woman can deal with rhetorical drama surrounding her work or familial pressures which in the Indian scenario runs the risk of multiplying manifold owing to the continued existence of joint family setups. Because in the heart of hearts she knows she is doing fine when her little one wraps his tiny fist around her little finger and looks at her with unadulterated love and adoration.

  1. A Woman with nerves of steel and a heart of gold

Parenting a newborn is no piece of cake for a first-time mother; imagine having one with special needs… Your child carries a piece of your heart long after he/she has grown and flown the nest. Manju Rawat a Business Analyst settled in Hong Kong and raising a child with special needs, says, “It takes an immense amount of courage not to give up on your child when their pace of learning and development is not in sync with those of a similar age group and to give them the space to fall, learn and grow at their own chartered pace. Ultimately, it is not a race, each life is a life lived well if nurtured with love & compassion.” She signs off.

  1. A Financial pillar of strength for self and family

Gone are the days when a single income could suffice for families of four, people barely manage to make ends meet even in double-income families nowadays. With the average age of first-time motherhood witnessing steady rise for decades (from 22.7 in 1980 to 26 years in 2013, according to Centers for Disease Control), education levels have witnessed a proportional rise resulting in a culmination of highly skilled, well-paying jobs.

  1. A Partner to an equally involved father

The role of hands-on millennial father cannot be overlooked in each and every aspect of child-rearing. Whether it is changing diapers, bathing the little one, to feeding and burping them, the new age dads are well aware of their responsibilities and are willing to share the load. 

  1. An Emotionally intelligent woman

who may occasionally lose her marbles in the whole process of raising her munchkin, yet gets back in the game even if it is about being thrown back to square one.

 Aditi Korde, a banker who is an embodiment of a millennial mom, sums it up poignantly, “From bringing a life into this world to watching them develop their own identities, from surviving bouts of morning sickness to meeting deadlines at work, from looking flawless to sporting those scars, she does it all with élan & panache…”

Pic Credits: Mommy Jahanvi & son Arjun

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How To Be A Happy Stay At Home Mom

Probably the most difficult job in the world and the most unappreciated one is being a stay-at-home mommy (SAHM). You’re a cook, a cleaner, a babysitter, a driver, a caretaker all in one but you rarely get the appreciation or remuneration you deserve for it. However, being a stay-at-home mommy, especially when you were previously working can take a toll on your sanity. It can become very difficult to be at home for the majority of the day, even though you’re spending it taking care of your little ones and nobody can ever judge you for it. This is why its so important to develop a schedule and establish some ground rules so that, at the end of the day, you’re a happy mum with no complaints.

1. Get Dressed Every Day

Knowing that you’ll be spending all your time at home can make you lazy but make it a point that you take out some time every single day to get dressed and look your best. You aren’t doing this for anyone but yourself only. Tending to yourself will only boost your self-confidence even if you don’t plan on stepping out. 

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2. Find Something You Love

Don’t forget that your identity is more than that of a mom. So you need to find an activity that is just yours and that you can do when the kids are asleep or busy. It can be something as simple as knitting or cooking or something more complicated like working out or learning a new skill. This will help you take out time for yourself and you’ll feel fulfilled and happy at the end of the day.

3. Remember You’re A Mom…

…not a maid. It’s a common assumption that women who’re at home to take care of the kids will be doing all of the chores like cooking and cleaning too. Things should happen as they would if you were working. Delegate chores to your kids and husband too. Let them pick up after themselves. They live in the house too. You can even get professional help like a cook or a cleaner if you feel like.

4. Don’t Be Hard On Your Partner

If you were working pre-babies, it’s easy to feel resentment towards your partner that he’s there enjoying life but you’re here stuck at home. So don’t rely on him for constant validation or to read your mind or know what you need by reading your mind. Be vocal about what you want if you’re feeling down or how he can help you to do better. So don’t compete with him, work with him to make your life better!

5. Remember To Take Breaks

Wanting a break is absolutely okay. Nobody can judge you for it. After all, think about it – when you’re working in a office, you get leaves on the weekend and there are no weekly offs for when you’re a weekly mom. So taking a break once in a while is only fair. If a family member you trust offers help, take them up on it. You can return the favor later. If possible, you can even leave your children with their grandparents and go for a weekend getaway!

6. Have A Support Group

Nobody can understand your struggles of being a stay-at-home mom like the other SAHMs can. So build a strong support system for yourself through WhatsApp groups, weekly meetings or whatever works you. This way you’ll have someone to go to for advice or to vent to. They’ll understand exactly what you’re going through and be able to guide you through it!

7. Do Not Get Into Petty Comparisons

If you’re on social media (which we all are), it’s really easy to get into comparisons with others. Maybe your childhood friends don’t have kids yet and you can see them traveling to places you’ve always wanted to visit. Or maybe your former colleagues are doing better than ever in their jobs while you’re at home. Seeing all this may make you feel that you’re not exactly where you are but remember, comparisons are only the first step to being unhappy with your life.

8. Let Loose Sometimes

There is nothing like perfection, especially when it comes to motherhood. For once, take a break from trying to make everything perfect and just let go. Play with your kids, relive your childhood and let those dishes be!

9. Be Grateful

Instead of always thinking about what you’re missing or what life could’ve been, focus on what you have now. Thinking about how you could’ve had paychecks or could’ve been having a nice lunch with friends is only going to make you feel bad about yourself. You can, however, make your life better by thinking of the positives in your life like spending all that time with your precious little ones and giving them a beautiful life.

Picture Credit: Shweta Agrawal (Mommy in our Facebook Community)

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Hilarious Struggles Of Being A New Mom

Being a new mom is just not easy. From the feeding to the late nights to the nappy duties – it’s all a mighty struggle. But if you think about it all, it is quite funny. Bringing up a little tiny human is no mean feat but it is definitely a hilarious task. You have dark circles from the endless nights with no sleep, you haven’t brushed your hair in months and me time is now a distant dream.

So, if you’re a new mommy, you will definitely relate to these struggles.

1. Sleep is now a myth!

You haven’t had a good eight hours of sleep since the baby was born with all the feeding and the diaper changing and the crying. Your dark circles now make you look like a panda!

2. Self-care what?

The last time you took a spa day or took care of yourself was before the baby came. Now its all about feeding the little monster and your nails look like you were playing out in the ground.

3. Anxiety is a truth of life!

Anxiety is now as much a part of your daily life as eating or sleeping is. You’re constantly worried about the baby – panicking about whether s/he’s crying because s/he’s hungry or because s/he wants his diaper changed.

4. You have an identity crisis

Suddenly all you are is a mom, just a mom! You cannot think about anybody else except your baby. In all this, you’re trying to re-discover who you are and it is a mighty struggle!

5. Your body needs to behave!

You just gave birth. I mean you grew a baby in your body for nine months and then pushed it out. Couldn’t have been easy, could it? But now your body isn’t what it used to be and you need it to behave.

6. You can wait, dear husband!

You love your husband but he isn’t a priority anymore – the baby is. You just can’t take out time for him because now your life is all about the little one. Let’s not even get started on the sexy time!

7. But you wouldn’t trade it for the world…

You wouldn’t trade this feeling of being a mom and holding the little one in your arms for anything in the world. Your little bundle of joy means the world to you and nothing makes you happier than him/her!

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Looking to start your own blog and need expert advise? Get consultation from Neha Agarwal. Email her on neha@criesandcrawls.com

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